Today is a momentous day in human history. Not only is it the day rumours started swirling that Taylor Swift and Tom Hiddleston have broken up, thus ending the most ridiculous and long-winded performance arts piece of recent times, it’s also the day this little ol’ blog of mine goes live.
Starting a blog has been something I’ve always wanted to do but various things have held me back over the years: lack of time, fear of failure, doubts as to whether anyone will read it or like it or care. Through all these fears and doubts the thought has stayed with me in the back of my mind, near all the lyrics of the Spice Girls’ Stop Right Now and that recipe for making a chocolate cake in the microwave everyone was doing circa 2008. Over the last few weeks the desire to actually do it has grown fuelled by one massive realisation: there are at least another 40 years standing between me and retirement unless I do something drastic. I’ve always found great comfort in the knowledge that if all else fails I could start a wildly successful blog, maybe appear in a BuzzFeed of 27 Young Australian Bloggers You Need To Be Following Like Yesterday, become an in-demand guest speaker, get a book deal and then completely sell out by accepting any sponsored content or endorsement deal that came my way and retire by the age of 35.
More than anything, though, I just like writing. This is totally my passion project, you guyssss!
Here’s a taste of what you can expect if enough of you choose to follow my blog, allowing me to finally to quit the Monday to Friday, 9 to 5 life and maybe actually make it to the post office during business hours for once:
- Witty (some would say ‘bitchy’ but they’re probably ugly) observations on celebrity news and reality TV
- Updates on my (largely unsuccessful) attempts to live as an adult in this ridiculous world
- Regular complaints about my weird neighbours who right this minute appear to be testing their new amplification system – it’s working just fine, guys!
Today is the day I bite the bullet and send this baby live. It’s something I’ve thought of doing many times but never gone through with. Many 3.00am inspirations and brilliant shower ideas have gone into this and it’s finally time to hit the ‘publish’ button. As Taylor Doose once said, “We are gathered here on this glorious spring day, pregnant with pride and anticipation, preparing to birth you from our collective womb, fully gestated and nourished. And so we breathe deep, and, with these last, painful contractions, we push you out into the world, spank your bottom, and wipe the amniotic fluid from your eyes as you issue your first independent breath.”
I hope you like it and I hope, like Rory Gilmore, it goes on to be hugely successful and popular.